Friends Meeting of Washington
Minutes
Monthly Meeting for Worship with a Concern for Business
June 2014
Do you make your home a place of affection where God's presence is felt? Do you practice family prayer? Do you share your deepest beliefs and interests with all in the family? Do you grow together through sharing prosperity and adversity? Can you keep a sense of humor and avoid taking yourself too seriously? Do you establish family standards including the mutual obligations of children and adults?
Are you as children learning to be accountable for your own actions? Do you as parents help your children to grow in independence and responsibility? Do you consider the needs of grandparents and older members of the family circle?
Advices
Marriage presents unique opportunities for growth. Many of these challenges come wrapped in love. The need for equality and sharing within a marriage places on both partners the responsibility to preserve and build family life. Some redefinition of roles and sacrifice of traditional privileges may be necessary. Close to each other we become aware of our strengths and weaknesses, responsibly carrying them together.
We thank God, then for the pleasures, joys and triumphs of marriage; for the cups of tea we bring each other, and the seedlings in the garden frame; for the domestic drama of meetings and partings, sickness and recovery; for the grace of occasional extravagance, flowers on birthdays and unexpected presents; for talk at evenings of the events of the day; for the ecstasy of caresses; for gay mockery of each other's follies; for plans and projects, fun and struggle; praying that we may neither neglect nor undervalue these things, nor be tempted to think of them as self-contained and self-sufficient.
(London Yearly Meeting, 1959)5 [1]
BaltimoreYearly Meeting, Home Life [2]
Voices
When I was a child, the man who lived next door and who was our landlord, tried to rape me. He then frightened me into silence, threatening to make us homeless again if I were to tell. My mother used to say, “I can’t think why you have changed so much.” Well of course I knew, but I couldn’t tell, so I withdrew into a shell. People used to say how serious I had become. Where was all my former sparkle?
Thirty years later, his wife visited my father after my mother’s death. I happened to be there at the time. She told me that her husband whom we had called Uncle Sid, was dying. I knew at once from the sudden lurch of my stomach what I had to do. I had to go and see him. I was terrified.
The next day I drove to the hospital. I parked outside, and then I became paralysed with fear. I simply could not get out of the car. “God,” I prayed urgently, “you’ll have to take over. I can’t do this myself.” I was able to get out of the car and go and find Uncle Sid. He was very shocked to see me and looked frightened. But God had taken over, and I was given just the right gentle words to say, and Uncle Sid said to me, “I can’t thank you enough for coming. Now I can die at peace.” - Diana Lampen, 1991 (from Pacific Yearly Meeting, extracts from the writings of Friends)
2014/6-1 Welcome of Visitors
Meeting for Business opened with 23 people present.
2014/6-2Clerk’s Report
The Clerk reported that:
· Certificates are available for first time attenders to the Baltimore Yearly Meeting (BYM).
· Members of Friends Meeting of Washington (FMW) met with an ad hoc Vision Implementation Committee for BYM who are visiting each Monthly Meeting this spring as part of their work to come up with a set of recommendations for the Yearly Meeting by August.
· Today, June 8, is Pride Day and the Quakers have a booth, so please stop by.
· The American Friends Service Committee (AFSC) is sending speakers from East Asia to talk about their work there; they’ll be at FMW on Sunday, June 22 at rise of meeting.
· The Gathering at Friends General Conference (FGC) starts on June 29 in California, Pennsylvania.
· FMW space is being used by several wonderful people outside our community who are paying: activities include diverse items like a film made on our campus, a poetry slam contest with students from Mississippi, an intra-Muslim dialogue, a lobby training event for a national transgender group, rehearsal space for the Fringe Festival, 3 memorial services, 2 weddings, and a group working to shore up services for the poor, plus our usual language classes.
· FMW co-hosted a workshop/training on Undoing Racism. 45 participants of several races were present. There will be another session on June 20-22.
· Joan Gildemeister was in the hospital recently. The Clerk asked for Friends to lend her support and encouragement.
· 21 people were present for the recent workday at FMW. The next workday is in September.
· On May 31, 14 women who are 50 or older gathered for a ‘Meeting of the Crones’. They hope to hold another such gathering in the fall.
· The Clerk expressed an interest in facilitating a large celebration to mark the birthdays of our more senior friends.
Major items
2014/6-3 Memorial Minutes
The memorial minute of Sara Satterthwaite was presented. A Friend expressed concern about the wording in the minute that implied that racism was southern in nature. The minute was approved with revisions to the wording in question.
The memorial minute of Marjorie ‘Marney’ Abott Akins was presented. The minute was approved.
2014/6-4 Finance and Stewardship
Byron Sanford from the Finance and Stewardship Committee did the second presentation of draft budget [3]. The Committee feels that they have created a conservative budget and have attempted to address questions posed at the budgets first presentation.
After questions and clarifications about the budget, Friends approved the budget.
2014/6-5 Ad hoc small group on Safety and Welcoming
The co-clerk of the ad hoc small group, Margaret Green, presented a progress report on the community meetings, small group work, and steps toward drafting a Safety and Welcoming Policy. The group hopes to have something to present to MfB in July.
A Friend commented on two of the statements made at the second community meeting hosted by the ad hoc small group and wished to acknowledge the courage of the attender who has attended Meeting, under escort, while this process is being undertaken. Another Friend commented on the impact this issue has had on the Meeting in regards to encouraging Friends to engage on a meaningful level to move forward with this issue.
Other Business
2014/6-6 Religious Education Committee
Kim Aquaviva presented the Annual report for the Religious Education Committee. This report covers the past 6 months.
There is steady attendance to First Day School at all levels. First Say School has benefited from dynamic programming, largely due to Windy Cooler, who will be leaving at the end of the summer. The Committee is beginning to look for her replacement.
There will not be first day school during the summer but childcare and ‘supervised play’ will be provided.
The Committee expressed pleasure with the progress being made on Safety and Welcoming. A Friend expressed admiration and thanks for the current work being done by the Religious Education Committee.
2014/6-7Nominating Committee – Merry Pearlstein
David Etheridge was nominated to the Capitol Campaign Committee. His nomination wasapproved.
2014/6-8Search Committee – Margaret Greene
Beth Cogswell has served on Nominating Committee for 6 years and the Search Committee, comprised of Arne Paulson, Judy Hubbard, Meg Greene and Debby Churchman, is working to identify her replacement.
2014/6-9 Membership Committee – Marcia Reecer
Michael Conklin has requested to transfer to Sandy Spring Meeting. Friends accepted this transfer.
Candida Quinn has requested a transfer to the Montana Quarterly Gathering of Friends of the North Pacific Yearly Meeting. Friends accepted this transfer.
Her daughter, Caroline Quinn, requested to remain an associate member at FMW.
2014/6-10 Property Committee – Steve Brooks
The property committee asked for permission to spend up to $20,000 to repair the terrace, which is also the Decatur place room’s ceiling. The anticipated cost of this project, based upon obtained quotes, may be less than the requested amount. A Friend expressed a desire that we document these repairs so we are able to refer back to these works. Property Committee is working on a Reserve study to figure out the anticipated life of property elements and how much the cost of their replacement might be in order to establish reserves for maintenance and repair. Friends approved this expenditure.
The property committee also asked for permission to spend up to $20,000 to repair railings and stonework on the campus. A Friend requested that we make sure we have a solid warranty. Friends expressed that this has become a safety issue and that time is now a factor. Friends approved this expenditure.
2014/6-11 Additional Question
A Friend asked when the Meeting stopped presenting a Sharing Budget and requested that future presentations of the budget have this indicated in some way.
2014/6-12 Minutes, Friends approved the minutes.
2014/6-13The Meeting closed with approximately 17 members in attendance.
October 5, 1942 -- July 31, 2013
Sara Satterthwaite first came to Friends Meeting of Washington in the 1980s. She had been brought up as a Unitarian in Bucks County, Pennsylvania, but she liked to joke about having Quakerism in her genes, claiming that a Quaker ancestor had been read out of meeting for marrying a Portuguese sailor. She was strongly drawn to Quaker social justice and peace testimonies as well as to Friends' silent worship and to the absence of hierarchy and the openness that Quakers aspire to in their lives. She quickly became involved in the life and work of the Meeting and raised her two daughters, Pam and Meg, as Friends.
Sara worked hard for the Meeting, contributing her time and effort to many committees in the course of her 30 years at FMW. These included the Hunger and Homelessness Task Force, Religious Education, Ministry and Worship, Peace and Social Concerns, Personal Aid, and Hospitality. She taught the Inquirers' class, was an advocate for the Washington Peace Center, which used to be housed on the third floor of the meetinghouse, and a founding member of the Friends of John Woolman, an informal group thatworked to raise awareness of racism and privilege among Friends. She also served as clerk of the William Penn House Board, an assignment she found particularly valuable and satisfying. Sara was a regular attender at the Meeting for Worship with a Concern for Business, which she considered an important part of her commitment to the Meeting. When she joined FMW after 20-plus years as an attender, many people were surprised to find they were welcoming as a new member someone who had already contributed so much to the meeting.
She grew up during the Civil Rights era in a family where racial equality was a core value. In one of her first jobs, as a social worker in Philadelphia, she became familiar with the same kind of racism, both conscious and unconscious, that she was later to find when she moved to Washington, D.C. These influences and her own early awareness about white privilege and its corrosive effect on blacks and whites alike led to her lifelong concern with racism. Throughout her time at FMW, she was active in groups that worked to understand racism and counter its effects, among Friends themselves as well as in the larger society. She spent many years in Process Work DC, learning how people's assumptions about race play out in everything they do and say. It was not enough, she believed, to confront overt racism. White people had to cultivate awareness of the racism that was often implicit in their assumptions and thus in their actions and speech. Sara was always willing to challenge people, gently but firmly, to look at their actions and pay attention to what they were saying, but she did not make big statements about her beliefs or judge other people to be "racist." She embodied the equality she believed in by the way she perceived and treated others--whoever they were and wherever she met them.
Sara also felt deeply about the peace testimony. Like the testimony of equality, she saw it as a matter of personal practice, not just belief. Over the years, she participated in many peacemaking efforts and projects, most recently a series of meetings on torture, which she helped to organize. For a number of years, she and Neil Froemming, her companion and later husband, hosted Hiroshima and Nagasaki survivors who visited Washington on the anniversary of the bombing. Sara was a natural peacemaker, and everyone who knew her benefited from her willingness to "seek peace and pursue it." She did not do this by simply agreeing or by avoiding contentious issues. Her way of approaching potentially difficult situations at FMW and elsewhere was to speak directly to those involved and attempt to find some common ground. She believed that if people could recognize where they agreed, they would have a basis for talking and could begin the process of coming to an agreement. She understood that making peace is an active not a passive thing and that it involves patience, skill, and courage from all concerned. She was always willing to do this work.
Sara delighted in the world around her and wanted to see it as deeply and clearly as possible, and if the shapes of trees in winter or an insect's wing deserved her close attention, this was doubly true for human beings. She wanted to know about whoever she met. So she reached out to them (for Sara that was not just a metaphor: her favorite form of greeting was a hug). She had an uncanny gift for creating intimacy, probably because she liked people and really paid attention to what they said. When Sara talked with people they felt special, listened to, even if she did not agree with what they said and told them so. As a result they opened up to her. They sought her out, asked for her help or advice, wanted to talk things through with her. She often struck up conversations with people she met in stores, on the street or in their front yards, and after such conversations she often ended up hearing details about their lives and their work. She greeted homeless people on the street by asking them how they were doing and stopping to listen to what they had to say.
Sometimes casual contacts led to Sara's becoming involved in the lives of the people she met. For example, this happened with two homeless people whom she found living in her backyard when she moved to Capitol Hill from McLean. Her reaction was to consider them neighbors and treat them that way. She talked with them about their lives and helped them deal with the problems that poor people living on the edge of society often face, taking them to appointments, offering them a place to get their mail, helping them manage their money, and sometimes giving them small amounts of cash.
It could be hard to get Sara on the phone because of her enormous list of people to call. That was true to nearly the end of her life. When she finished an appointment she often sat in the little green car that she referred to as her office, calling and writing emails to people who expected to hear from her. A friend once asked her how she could be interested in so many people. She put it down to curiosity. She was, as she said, always up for what might be coming next.
Sara spent half her life "battling" diabetes and cancer complicated by asthma and other health problems, but she vehemently rejected that metaphor. It is truer to say that she strove to live lightly with poor health. The diseases and the often strenuous treatments she underwent were facts in her life but she did not let them turn her into a patient. Even in her last years when cancer treatments were continuous and harrowing, she did not become absorbed in her illness. If someone was impertinent enough speak of her bravery or sympathize with her suffering, she would change the subject. One of the first things a new acquaintance would be told is "don't ask Sara how she feels." The truth was she enjoyed life and wanted it to go on as long as it continued to be a pleasure. She often said she was a healthy person who had cancer, and she lived that way.
She was an off-and-on meditator for many years, beginning with the Maharishi and Transcendental Meditation. Her practice took on a new seriousness when her cancer, which had been in remission for a number of years, returned. She approached a Buddhist teacher whom she had heard talk and asked if he would guide her and a group of friends in learning to practice Vipassana meditation. She found her daily meditation practice and Buddhist ideas about human happiness and suffering enormously helpful. The focus on living in the present moment (because only that is real) helped her accept the uncertainty of her life. She got special strength from the "don't know mind," another formulation of our total inability to see beyond what is in front of us. It was a kind of mantra that steadied her and helped her continue to live in her life, with joy as well as sadness, as death approached. Ten days before she died she sent this message to her friends: "I want you to know that at the end of my journey, I have found peace and that there isn't anything to worry about."
Sara was generous with her love, but she was no Pollyanna. She was a complex woman with a healthy dose of skepticism and an ironic view of the world. Because she had a keen insight into her own and other people's flaws, she was often uneasy with the adulation people heaped on her. She was usually gentle with the flaws of others, but she could be sarcastic and cutting, as her friends knew. Sara had a delight in adventure and an independent streak--you might call it stubborn--often ignoring the advice that others were eager to give her. Because she was always open, always looking, always questioning, she wondered, sometimes, if she was who she seemed to be. Above all, she loved life and wanted as much of it as possible.
Sara spent her final days at home cared for by her husband Neil and daughter Meg. She had already said goodbye to many of her friends but knowing that there were people in the Meeting whose love and friendship she wished to acknowledge, she asked Neil to invite all who wanted to come to meetings for worship at their house. That was her final, generous, gift to Friends Meeting of Washington.
October 22, 1927 - March 31, 2014
Marjorie “Marney” Abbott was born in Brooklyn, NY and grew up in Warwick, New York. Her father was an attorney, and in this household communication was key. Her sister, smiling, said, “In our house, we heard, ‘If you don’t have something to say, don’t waste words proving it to everyone.”
She graduated from Rockford College (now University) in Rockford, IL in 1948. Marney noted that pioneer social worker Jane Addams was one of its first graduates. She greatly respected both Addams’ idealism and her pragmatism. Marney then went on to earn a Masters degree in Russian Studies at Harvard.
In the summer of 1950, Marney worked with an American Friends Service Committee (AFSC) work camp in Finland and Germany. For two more years she worked with the World Council of Churches in Europe in refugee settlements. On an ocean journey home in 1952 she met James Akins.
Marney then worked at AFSC’s International Student House (ISH), located near and supported by Friends Meeting of Washington (FMW), as Jim awaited a Foreign Service posting. Marney carried fond memories of ISH, founded by Quakers in 1936. Refusing to despair at either world events or local racial segregation, they had sought to make a contribution to peace and a better understanding among young adults of diverse national backgrounds. Now independent, it has succeeded to this day.
Marney and Jim married in Warwick, NY on May 22, 1954. She was now a Foreign Service wife, a position that Washingtonians knew meant an often unacknowledged, and even more often underappreciated, role in the process of diplomacy. In the next two years the Foreign Service took the Akins to Rome, Paris and Strasbourg. Marney arranged for moving and for regularly entertaining guests, understanding that entertaining was the lifeblood of informal diplomacy. One had to be a quick study on food, culture, politics, certainly, but these needed to be underpinned with an awareness of religion, economics and social issues, always knit together by the common humanity of the individuals at the table and respect for the peoples whom they represented. Shared understandings and strong relationships would build toward peace.
This life was not all about conversations, however. In 1956 the Suez conflict reverberated internationally, and Jim was called to Syria. Marney was not allowed to go for a year. They then served in Lebanon, followed by Kuwait, when son Tom was adopted, and then in Baghdad, Iraq, when daughter Mary Beth was adopted. In Iraq they endured the violence of a government takeover, sheltering in the inner rooms of their home.
1965 brought them back to Washington for several years. The family joined Friends Meeting of Washington in March of 1966 by transferring from the Meeting at Brummana Friends School in Lebanon. Also transferred to the United States was a remarkable collection of archaeological pieces discovered on weekend expeditions into the desert while in Iraq. This passion for archaeology stayed with them always. For Marney, who volunteered to work on pieces like these at the Smithsonian Institution, they were far from just shards – they had lessons, contexts, and meaning for us today. Said one Friend, “She really was a teacher.”
While in Washington, Marney and Jim entertained many guests, and attended cultural events regularly. However, Friends knew Marney for her service on the Religious Education Committee for six years, including serving as its Clerk. The FMW history notes that in 1968 there were “120 pupils with 29 teachers and aides.” Marney quietly recalled aloud having to rent classroom space near the Meeting House, but the work went far beyond that. Friends may recall that this was still a time when sharp distinctions were made: men had “professions” and women had “activities.” Some of these “activities” provided the backbone of support to then-larger Quaker Meetings.
A note to the Meeting dated September 6, 1973, simply says, “We expect to be moving to Saudi Arabia in early October, so I must regretfully resign from the Overseers Committee.” Jim had been appointed as the U.S. Ambassador to Saudi Arabia. He held this post until February, 1976. During this time, one of the many guests Marney hosted was Patricia Nixon, wife of the United States President, in 1974. Within a year, both Quaker husbands would be removed from their positions amidst very different controversies. In Jim’s case, it was a difference with his boss, Secretary of State Henry Kissinger, who was suggesting U.S. dominance over Mideast oil production by use of force, if needed.
From 1976 on, the Akins were based in Washington, with Jim no longer part of the Foreign Service, but instead a consultant for corporations. Marney was now freer from “wife of” duties, but she continued to extend hospitality to friends from all over the world. Cultural events were a vital part of the couple’s lives. Grandchildren were much beloved. Marney and Jim still traveled.
Friends were the beneficiaries of much of this newly-available time. At FMW she served on Overseers and Nominating Committees, as Recording Clerk, and was a regular volunteer at the Meeting House. She performed historian’s duties, including preparing materials to be sent to the Swarthmore archives. She served on and helped manage the process for the Yearly Meeting history project for the 1993-2003 volumes. She worked to make Quakerism visible locally in organizations such as the District of Columbia Historical Society, providing Quaker historical content for some exhibits.
About her role as a Recording Clerk, a former FMW Presiding Clerk recalled: “. . . that period of shared service remains one of the highlights of my time at Friends Meeting of Washington. Marney was steeped in an understanding of and appreciation of process and ‘right order.’ I have rarely worked with any person who understood the importance of precision and clarity in preventing misunderstandings arising at some future date. Marney had a practice of pre-writing minutes of sections of a Meeting for Business where she believed that the action proposed was uncontroversial or routine. Yet she was willing to drop even the most elegantly expressed pre-written minute when she realized that what had occurred was no longer was accurately reflected in her original words. Marney’s minutes exhibit the art of the Quaker minute. Spare in expression, nothing important was omitted and the views of Friends struggling with a controversial issue were captured with an open heart and attention to the inner music that explains so much of how Friends conduct their affairs. When planning for Meeting for Business, Marney had a valuable instinct about the ordering, timing and phrasing of issues. Unknown to most Friends, the fact that Meetings for Business managed to cover enormous ground and yet were sufficiently open to permit time and space when needed, owed a great debt to her feelings for the rhythm that went into a well-run meeting.”
“Beyond her key role as an exemplary Recording Clerk,” a Friend recalls, “Marney was a virtual welcoming committee for Friends Meeting of Washington . . . A newcomer would stand to introduce himself or herself following the rise of Meeting, and you could count on the fact that Marney would home in on the visitor, talking about where they came from, people they might know who had an FMW connection, and demonstrating an inclusive delight in new people. Dozens of Friends recall their first introduction to Friends Meeting of Washington came when Marney would come talk to them and they would find themselves invited to come to her home that very day for lunch and to get better acquainted.”
Marney is fondly remembered for her attendance at Baltimore Yearly Meeting (BYM) Interim Meeting Days and Annual Session in August each year. Through a period of 15 years or more in the 1980s and 1990s, Marney served on the Education Funding Resources Committee, as BYM Recording Clerk, and on the BYM Records and Handbook Committee, including four years as Clerk of the Committee.
In the early 2000s, Marney and Jim moved to the Collington retirement community, some distance from the Meeting. Marney regularly attended a Friends worship group there. Jim died July 15, 2010. After Jim’s death, Marney’s stamina was not the same as before.
Missing from present memories are Marney’s recollections of the Foreign Service during the McCarthy era, or living through the 1968 riots in Washington, or how the long, wounding years of the Viet Nam War affected FMW. In quiet conversation, after her service as a diplomatic wife, it could be almost unsettling to hear how calmly Marney could think the unthinkable. Faced with a difficult situation, this warm, gracious Friend would step back and calmly look ahead with strong compassion, without much sentimentality, and start evaluating the possible opportunities at hand. One Friend recently noted Marney’s frequent gift at Memorial Meetings: As Friends recalled all that had been offered in the life now past, Marney would stand and say, “Who will take up the work that this Friend has laid down?”
Friends Meeting of Washington (FMW)
Report of the Religious Education Committee for January-June 2014
Presented at the June Meeting for Worship with a Concern for Business
Committee members:Kim Acquaviva (Clerk), Rob Farr (Recording Clerk), Jane Connor, Anita Drever, Nicole Else-Quest, Carrie Mitchell, Windy Cooler (Youth Program Coordinator and ex officio committee member)
The Religious Education committee cares deeply for the spiritual lives of the children in our Meeting and we rejoice in how much they bring life and Spirit to our Meeting. FDS and youth programs at Friends Meeting of Washington have continued to grow and deepen in the six months since our last report, thanks to the ongoing commitment of our community. The following describes our progress and programming during the period from January 2014 through June 2014:
Nursery– Head of Nursery: Makai Kellogg
The Meeting offers child care to our littlest attenders – those frombirth through 4 years of age -each week during 10:30 Meeting for Worship as well as during the monthly Meeting for Worship with a Concern for Business. Our nursery continues to serve a growing body of Quaker families and visitors to FMW, necessitating the promotion of our long-time nursery worker Makai Kellogg to the position of Head of Nursery. Makai supervises all staff in the nursery and will be working closely with the Child Safety Committee to ensure the hygiene and physical safety of the nursery environment in addition to welcoming families in the sensitive and warm manner we have become accustomed to. Our nursery is well staffed a rotating team of paid caregivers (including our beloved Katorra who has been with us for many years) providing care to a growing number of young children in the Meeting. We continue to provide skilled childcare for special events at FMW and are grateful to the Meeting for approving the larger Religious Education budget last year that has made this possible.
Lower Elementary– Coordinator: Jay Harris
The Lower Elementary (LE) class at First Day School supports the religious education of children ages 4 to 6 years old. This class has seen strong support and attendance by children of FMW members and attenders, as well as parents of School for Friends. On average, there are five children each First Day. The LE class has a dedicated group of parents who volunteer to lead the class; special thanks to Anita Drever, Robin Appleberry, Nicole Else-Quest, and Jay Harris. Other volunteer leads join the class as their schedule permits. There are always two teachers - the lead and their support – for each class.
Upper Elementary– Coordinator: Michael Beer
The Upper Elementary (UE) class supports the religious education of children ages 7 to 11 years old. UE children continue to visit the Church of the Pilgrims monthly to make sandwiches for the homeless. The first Sunday of every month, all children and parents join together in a “Family Meeting for Worship.” There are always two adult leads/teachers for every First Day, and we continue to have a large number of volunteers who help make the UE class a dynamic and Spirit-filled learning community for our youth.
Overview of Programming in Lower and Upper Elementary Classes
Our two elementary classrooms (lower elementary and upper elementary) have had many special guests this year, learning about Quaker history and philosophy as well as themes like inward looking, social concerns, and just having fun. Our special guests are Friends not involved in regular classroom instruction who have a special talent or topic they would like to share. We've made "zines", planted a garden, read books, played games, held a (loud!) drumming circle with pots and spoons in the park, and learned about Right Sharing of World Resources. Our youth benefited greatly from the knowledge, experience, and passion shared by our special guests, and we are deeply appreciative of the gifts of time, talent, and Spirit each of them shared with our youth.
The two elementary classes, while still distinct, have had several classroom experiences with one another as we cross bridges, exploring what we might be able to do with people our own age and what we might be able to do with people older and younger. Our youth continue to learn about how to care for the building we share with so many other Friends, making a paper "fire" for Thanksgiving, decorating the windows for our Spring Simple Meal with School for Friends, and daydreaming about new ways to play in the gardens that surround us.
Junior Young Friends/Tweens &Teens– Coordinator: Kim Acquaviva
The past 6 months have been vibrant ones for the youth in the Junior Young Friends group (AKA “Tweens and Teens.”) The Tweens & Teens launched “The Quaker Ukulele Collective” earlier this spring, beginning a tradition of chaotically melodious, Spirit-filled jam sessions each First Day in the third-floor room where we meet. Although there are always two or more adults present, the Quaker Ukulele Collective is essentially a leaderless initiative of the tweens and teens. A big part of the fun of the Collective is that it’s totally unlike a structured music lesson. There are no “teachers” – just ukuleles, a stack of songbooks, a few pictures showing ukulele chords, and two or more “Friendly Adult Volunteers” (AKA “FAVe’s”) who sit quietly in the room as a resource the tweens & teens can choose to engage with (or not). Learning is experiential, with the tweens & teens figuring out chords, trying out different ways to strum, and teaching one another new skills as they figure them out themselves. It’s been a joy to watch the tweens and teens work collaboratively to experience the creation of music in a wholly unstructured and joy-filled way.
The Tweens & Teens have several people they would like to thank and recognize. First, they give particular thanks to Emilie Schmeidler and Ken Orvis - two steadfast volunteers who have given their time, energy, and enthusiasm to the group throughout the year. Emilie and Ken embody the very kindness, patience, enthusiasm, and unconditional love we hope our tweens & teens will come to emulate. The Tweens & Tweens Group would also like to acknowledge the following Friends who donated ukuleles to the Collective: Sally Hill Cooper, Haverford Friends Meeting; The Connor-Olabi Family, FMW; The Avanesyan Family, FMW; Bertrand (“Bertie”) Rossert, FMW; Dan Dozier & Martha Solt, FMW; and The Acquaviva-Brandt Family, FMW. Individual tweens & teens became the designated "teen uke steward" for a ukulele that had been donated to the Collective. Each of the Collective's ukuleles have a colorful tag attached to the case (see pic below), acknowledging the name of the donor and the name of the "teen uke steward" playing and caring for that ukulele.
The Tweens & Teens held a fundraiser to benefit Friends Meeting of Washington and sold 75 “Quaker Ukulele Collective” t-shirts (see pics above), raising a total of $306.02. This fundraiser ended up having an unintended side benefit: generating intergenerational excitement about the tweens’ & teens’ ukulele-playing efforts. The love and support shown by the FMW community to the tweens & teens is a big part of why they didn’t hesitate to follow their leading to play a song for Friends after Meeting for Worship on June 1st – a song they had just taught each other about 20 minutes earlier. There’s something magical about watching teens teach, support, and encourage one another (“Just play the one chord you know and you’ll do great!”).
In the Fall, the Tweens & Teens “Quaker Ukulele Collective” will continue meeting weekly. We’re going to experiment with a 10-minute “Donuts and Dialog” period at the start of each session to see if this will increase discussion and cut down on the amount of donut dust coating our ukes. J
BaltimoreYearly Meeting
Our Yearly Meeting(BYM) continues to have a very active youth program that includes regular weekend retreats at Monthly Meetings throughout BYM for those in 6th through 8th grade – Junior Young Friends –(see http://jyf.bym-rsf.net [4]) and those aged 14-20–Young Friends –(see: http://yf.bym-rsf.net/ [5]). Parents of FMW teens report to us that the BYM programs are just wonderful and enable the teens to get to know other younger Friends from all over the area and they have the time of their lives together while practicing lived Quakerism through the regular retreats they have. The next gathering for both Young Friends and Junior Young Friends is AnnualSession(http://www.bym-sf.org/events/annualsession/ashome.html [6]) It takes place from August 5th-10th at Frostburg State University. Rising 6-8th graders stay in dorm rooms with their parents, but gather throughout each day for various activities. Rising 9th graders have the choice of participating in the middle school program or the high school program. Rising 10-12th graders and FAPs stay in rooms all on the same floor, and build a lived community like a conference. If they are 18 years old, high school graduates have the choice of participating in the high school program, or the Young Adult Program (18-35 years old). Register online at https://bym-rsforg.presencehost.net/events/annualsession/registration.html [7]before June 23rd for the lowest rates. Friends may contact Alison Duncan, BYM Youth Programs Manager, at youthprograms@bym-rsf.org [8]for more information.
Adult Religious Education Study Group– Coordinated by John Scales
During the past six months the study group met generally once or twice a month on Sundays before the Meeting for Worship. It benefited by the contributions of new, as well as long-standing members, as they shared in their readings and led discussions.
Over more than a decade of its meetings, it has considered a wide range of topics of interests chosen to enhance appreciation of contributions Quakers and others make to individual spiritual growth and society. Sessions over the years have addressed Quaker history and Quaker leaders (e.g. George Fox, John Woolman), Social activists with Quaker backgrounds (e.g Lucretia Mott, Susan B. Anthony, Bayard Rustin), writers with Quaker influences (e.g., James Michener, Thornton Wilder, Walt Whitman). Religions such as Hinduism, Judaism and Buddhism, have been considered in terms of their tenets and differences and similarities to Quaker beliefs and approaches. Movements in which Quakers have been very involved, for example the Underground Railroad and Peace Testimony have been featured. Writers about spirituality from other religions and contemporary issues are also considered.
Since last Fall, the group considered a number of different subjects and sources, led by members of the group and guests, including:
· Patrick Lynam on Howard Kushner’s book: "When Bad Things Happen to Good People", based partially on the Book of Job. Kushner was a rabbi in a large congregation. He knew first-hand about family disasters such as: death, disease, job loss, divorce. Kushner’s aim is to avoid being like “Job’s counselors” by giving thoughtless advice to people in crisis.
· Blair Forlaw on “Friends and Neighbors Building a Sustainable Peacein Rwanda.” with a guest speaker, Theoneste Bizimana, coordinator of AGLI’s Healing and Rebuilding Our Communities Program in Rwanda (HROC). A response to the awful and lasting devastation of the 1994 genocide, HROC workshops bring perpetrators and survivors together in a shared experience to acknowledge and grapple with the events and consequences of the violence, restore trust, rebuild communities that were torn apart – physically, socially, economically, and emotionally. HROC is a centerpiece of several programs sponsored by the African Great Lakes Initiative to promote a sustainable peace in Rwanda, Burundi, Kenya, Uganda, and the Democratic Republic of the Congo.
· Blair Forlaw, Molly Tully and John Scales regarding the history of Quakers in Virginia and Maryland (particularly the Eastern Shore).
· Rob Callard, presenting wonderful Christmas Story he wrote himself.
· Patrick Lynam, the Atheist Delusions: The Christian Revolution and Its Fashionable Enemies, an entertaining and informative polemic directed against the spate of atheistic bestsellers (and some older works) denouncing Christianity including: Christopher Hitchens’ God is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything Ideal.
Ongoing Child Safety Discussions
We feel much gratitude in our hearts to those in our FMW community who are working to translate our shared commitments and hopes into a brief and actionable safety and welcoming policy for the Meeting. The foundational work for this effort was ably led by Marsha Holliday and the Child Safety Committee, leading to the ultimate approval of a Child Safety Policy by FMW’s Meeting for Worship with a Concern for Business in 2013. As members of the RE Committee, we hold in the Light the ad hoc group that has now formed to endeavor to explore ways to know the people who worship with us, and in the case of those who may be perceived as a threat to the community, understand their situations well enough to manage possible dangers while understanding our own fears and concerns so as to remain open and welcoming. Clerked by Meg Greene, Dan Dozier, Shannon Zimmerman and Gray Handley, the ad hoc group is composed of members from multiple committees and stakeholder groups at FMW, including from RE and the parent community. We feel fortunate to be part of a Meeting community in which difficult issues like this are explored, discussed, wrestled with, and prayerfully considered. Rough seas make for skillful sailors and, in the case of our Meeting community, a boat filled with sailors committed to working together to weather whatever storms come our way.
Appreciation for Windy Cooler, Your Programs Coordinator
When the Religious Education Committee selected and hired Windy Cooler, our Youth Program Coordinator, we saw an almost immediate transformation of the quality and organization of our youth programs. From her first days with us, Windy has made a significant impact on our Meeting, on our children, and on our hearts. The energy, positive spirit, and joy which Windy brought to FMW’s Youth Programs has been transformational, and both our nursery and First Day School programs are thriving thanks to her Spirit-filled leadership and coordination.
Windy will be leaving FMW at the end of August to begin her studies at Wesley Theological Seminary, a departure than brings both feelings of sadness and feelings of joy. We are sad to lose such a dynamic Youth Programs Coordinator, but our hearts sign with joy knowing that Windy is embarking on the next step of her personal spiritual journey. Windy will continue being a part of developing solid RE programs in her role as a BYM RE Committee member (along with Marsha Holliday and Mark Cannon), so we can look forward to her continued contributions to youth programming. We are grateful to Windy for all that she has done for the children of FMW and we wish her both luck and blessings on her journey.
Summer Plans for the Transition
This summer, FMW will offer nursery care and for the elementary grades, supervised playtime. Windy will continue to work with Makai over the summer to ensure there is staffing each week to cover these commitments. Before she leaves in mid- to late- August, Windy has let us know that she will be working with the appropriate committees to fully implement our new child safety policy; addressing issues of space maintenance; and helping to bring our teenagers into the meeting in adulthood, among other things. The RE Committee will advertise the Youth Programs Coordinator position this summer, with the goal of having a person hired and in place before FDS starts up again in the Fall.
Conclusion
The Religious Education Committee is excited about the progress and programming in FMW’s youth programs over the past 6 months, and we look forward to another vibrant year of religious education. We remain grateful to the Meeting for its generous financial support of our nursery, First Day School, and staffing. Thank you to all who have made our programs a success in 2014!
(here ends the Minutes and Reports from Meeting for Business, June 2014)
The Grate Patrol will pack and deliver 120 bag lunches and soup to people living on the street on Wednesday, July 2. Soup or chili is made in the afternoon. At 5:30 PM we start making sandwiches and packing the lunch bags. At 7 PM, we load the van and one or two people go out on delivery for about an hour. You’re welcome to help out with any or all of these things. Call Steve Brooks 240-328-5439 or email sbrooks@uab.edu [9]for more information.
Friends Meeting of Washington office will be closed on July 4.
Come to S.O.M.E. on Saturday, June 5 at 6:15 AM and be prepared to flip pancakes and help prepare breakfast for our vulnerable neighbors. The kitchen is at 70 “0” St. NW, adjacent to a parking lot. For more information and to sign up, contact Betsy Bramon at betsy.bramon@gmail.com [10]
Singing! On Sunday, July 6 in the Meeting Room, from 10:00 to 10:30. Come sing songs of praise and longing. All voices welcome. For more information, contact Debby at admin@quakersdc.org [11]
Work Day! Work Day! Work Day!Come to the Meetinghouse anytime between 9:00 am and 2:00 pm on Saturday, July 12 to participate in the monthly work day. All skill sets appreciated. Come ready to clean, paint, sort, dig, and spruce up your Meetinghouse. Have fun, meet/hang out with F/friends, and give back to the Meeting, all in one fell swoop. Lunch will be provided. For more information, contact Jean Harman at ellenjeanharman@hotmail.com [12]
Friendly Bible Studywill next meet on July 13 in the Parlor at 2:30. We will each be responding to five queries about the book of Mark. For more information about the Friendly Bible Study approach, see http://www.read-the-bible.org/FriendlyBibleStudy.htm [13]. If you have other questions you may ask David Etheridge, david.etheridge@verizon.net [14], 301-320-3470.
Quakers Say “No” to Cove Point, Sunday, July 13. Meeting for Worship from 11:30 to 12:30 in Taft Memorial Park (next to the Bell Tower), north of U.S. Capitol, on constitution Ave. between New Jersey Ave. and First Street. Bring a blanket or a chair. Rain location: FCNL, 245 Second St. NE. This Meeting for Worship is organized by Chesapeake Quarterly Meeting, a coalition of 9 Friends Meetings including Patuxent Friends Meeting which is adjacent to the proposed Cove Point Liquified Natural Gas (LNG) Facility. For a minute expressing the Quarterly Meeting’s opposition to this facility, see http://chesapeake.bym-rsf.net/?p=469 [15] From 1:00 to 4:00 pm, there will be a rally and march on this issue organized by the Chesapeake Climate Action Network, west of the Capitol Reflecting Pool. Say No to fracked gas exports at Cove Point and nationwide. For more information, contact chesapeakeQM@gmail.com [16]or call Karie Firoozmand at 410.302.1684.
August 4 – 10 – BYM – Come to Annual Session! Frostburg State University (Frostburg, MD) Let your Spirit grow! Baltimore Yearly Meeting’s Annual Session 2014 will be held at Frostburg State University in Frostburg, MD. The theme for this year is Transformation and Healing. You can refresh yourself at Monday’s retreat, take in the exciting plenary sessions, and engage in a range of activities for the whole family. The Spring edition of the Interchange contains all of the information regarding registration, including forms and rates. Online registration is now open! There are many ways to reduce the costs of attendance, including first-time attender certificates, work grants, and assistance for younger adult Friends. Check www.bym-rsf.org [17]for news and updates!
THINKING ABOUT RACE – The Housing Market Penalizes Integration
Excerpted by Elizabeth DuVerlie from an article by Dorothy Brown, Professor of tax law at Emory University Law School, “How Home Ownership Keeps Blacks Poorer Than Whites,” in Forbes Magazine, 12/10/2012
“Research shows that homes in majority black neighborhoods do not appreciate as much as homes in overwhelmingly white neighborhoods. This appreciation gap begins whenever a neighborhood is more than 10% black, and it increases right along with the percentage of black homeowners. Yet most blacks decide to live in majority minority neighborhoods, while most whites live in overwhelmingly white neighborhoods.
“If you think this is class and not race, you are wrong. A 2001 Brookings Institution study showed that “wealthy minority neighborhoods had less home value per dollar of income than wealthy white neighborhoods.” The same study concluded that “poor white neighborhoods had more home value per income than poor minority neighborhoods.” The Brookings study was based on a comparison of home values to homeowner incomes in the nation’s 100 largest metropolitan areas, and it found that even when homeowners had similar incomes, black-owned homes were valued at 18% less than white-owned homes.
“Put simply, the market penalizes integration: The higher the percentage of blacks in the neighborhood, the less the home is worth, even when researchers control for age, social class, household structure, and geography.”
The Baltimore Yearly Meeting Working Group on Racism meets during Yearly Meeting annual sessions and on the third Saturday of most months from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. For more information you may contact David Etheridge at david.etheridge@verizon.net [14].
AND NOW, IN THE “OH THOSE ROWDY QUAKERS!” DEPARTMENT:
From the Winchester Evening Star, May 16, 1921
Members of the Society of Friends in Winchester and Frederick County, who are with the Baltimore yearly meeting, are much interested in a proposal to revise the rules of conduct for its membership at the next annual meeting, making indulgence in dancing, card playing, and music a matter on conscience. The Baltimore meeting of the Liberal Friends, sometimes called Hicksite Quakers, is expected to make the revision.
The Quarterly, or May, meeting of the Society of Friends, begun on Saturday at the historic Hopewell Meeting House, was continued yesterday, and the final business session was being held today. The attendance yesterday was the largest in many years, and only a small portion of the crowd that flocked to Hopewell was able to get into the meeting house.
Some of the liberal members of the society expressed the opinion yesterday that they were in favor of revision of the rules of conduct and leaving such things as music, dancing, and card playing to the consciences of members. It was stated that a piano recently had been purchased and installed in the historic old Hopewell Meeting House, and that so far as is known no one objected to the music.
A few months ago, Gene Throwe and I, representing your Ministry & Worship committee, attended a gathering convened by Baltimore Yearly Meeting of other Ministry & Counsel committees throughout the YM. The clerk for this gathering (Meg Meyer) asked for agenda suggestions, and someone asked if we could discuss mentally ill and/or troubled, disruptive members and attenders. Meg asked for a show of hands of Meetings that have experienced this kind of disruption. Almost all hands went up.
Then an attender, who is by profession a mental health counselor and who has a schizophrenic daughter, said she longed for FCNL to work harder on behalf of all mentally ill people. She believes that as a community and a nation we have failed to support people facing these difficulties, and as a result, they tend to come to any group where they feel they may receive at least some sympathy if not some care. The trouble is that spiritual communities are only really set up to tend to spiritual needs. Because we rarely have either the professional expertise or the financial and physical resources to meet the pragmatic needs—for food, shelter, financial help, health care, and counseling—we often fail to successfully meet the needs of those with these issues. “We start out great,” she says, “but then we fail, and the need is ongoing, and we feel guilt and anger and resentment.” It’s a recipe for failure.
The conversation around how to best welcome troubled people is ongoing at FMW, both in the pastoral committees and in the Meeting as a whole as we labor to put policies in place. We have been helped in this with several recent articles in the May 2014 issue of Friends Journal around Quakers and mental illness; copies are available in the library and online at www.friendsjournal.org [18]
Then in June, a group of dynamic young Muslims came to me to ask if we would consider hosting an intra-Muslim gathering to discuss mental illness among Muslims in D.C. As far as they knew, it was the first time any local Muslim group had elected to discuss this delicate topic. They were very aware that they were breaking new ground. Could we help? I said yes, gave them the run of the Meeting House for a very below market price, and asked Patty Murphy to serve as the Friendly Presence. She reports that she has never been thanked so much for one event. The whole thing went off smoothly, with a large gathering in the Meeting Room, followed by a number of smaller discussion groups throughout the Meetinghouse. At the end they divided everyone into two groups and took each to one of our gardens to do evening prayers. Some passersby heard the prayers, Patty said, and knocked on our door, wanting to join in!
The courage these young Muslims have to face their mental health issues inspires me. Surely we can do the same.
- Debby
RECENT EVENTS
Catoctin Retreat (below)
Young Adult Friends Camping
Honoring the Elders (left)